Bound to the Past Cover Reveal!

So, sadly, RaineyCloud9 is no longer able to do my covers (sending her good thoughts for a speedy recovery and well wishes in life!), but I do have a cover reveal for Bound to the Past!  She did some of the work on it and then it was finished by photoarenaa on fiverr.com.

Sooooo good news and bad news.

The bad news:  I'm going out of town next week.  Hubby and I will have been married for 5 years on the 24th and we're going to Vegas and Phoenix!  However, I was really hoping to have Bound finished before we left so that I could let the beta readers have at it, come home, do the editing, and have it out by the 30th.  While my writing pace HAS picked up substantially, I don't think I'm going to be done before we go.  I will be bringing my laptop with me, but I'm not sure how much downtime I"ll have for writing, considering.  I might be finishing up editing, etc. the first week of October rather than the last week of September =/

The good news:  My writing pace has picked up substantially.  I'm just finished another chapter and I'm more than halfway through the book.  I'm also REALLY happy with the story.  I love what's going on with Andrew and Kate and giving them their HEA has been both difficult and incredibly satisfying.  Writing a "break up and get back together years later" story has been challenging, but I'm having so much fun with it.

That's where I'm at right now.  I think therapy is helping a lot.  I'm getting back on track on a lot of things in my life, including writing.  I wish I'd gone back to my therapist earlier, but we can only really go forward from here.  I feel much more myself though and happy to be back, although definitely feeling the deadline pressure!!! Trying to get as much writing done as I can before I leave next Wednesday.  If anyone's flying to Vegas that day, check the laptop of the women around you, maybe you can get a sneak peek of the story as I'm writing it! hahahahahaha

All the Pretty Things

I'm in the mood to ramble a bit!

My bestie got engaged over the holiday weekend.  SO happy for her.  It's kind of fun because I based a lot of Kate on her and Andrew has slowly become more and more like her fiance, so that's just enjoyable.  Even though they don't have the relationship that Kate and Andrew do, a lot of personality points are the same.

I went to my first therapy appointment in four years last night and all I can think is that I really wish I'd done that sooner.  I haven't been feeling like myself for a while.  There's just all these outside stresses that have been slowly piling on and I've been feeling more and more overwhelmed... and I deal with it by distracting myself and having fun, but I'm also off-center.  Which also means I haven't been getting as much writing done as I might like.  I've been doing a LOT of reading though.  Escapism at its best.

If anyone likes mysteries and romance, but doesn't care about the erotic parts, Amanda M. Lee has a new book in her Avery Shaw series out, and it's DELIGHTFUL.  I love almost everything she writes (I'm not a huge fan of Covenant College, but everything else is so much yes).  Eventually I'd love to write some first person mystery stuff.  I actually have a book (paranormal mystery in first person) that I wrote ages ago before I start publishing on amazon, but I want to makes some changes to it and I want to finish up the Stronghold series first.  Trying to do one thing at a time.  It's not always easy.

Speaking of not doing one thing at a time, I have a new story up on Literotica called Full Obedience.  It was a reader request that I really enjoyed writing.  A little bit out of my comfort zone, because I don't write often about people getting it on outside of their relationship, but it was kind of fun to do a bit of hot-wife BDSM stuff.  And it was nice to get something up on Lit again, that's not part of a series.  I've been struggling with writing in general lately, but hoping to change that!  I really do feel a LOT better after my therapy appointment, even though we didn't get to talk about everything I wanted to talk about, but just knowing that I'm going back again next week is super helpful.

I'm hoping to be able to kick it into high gear for Bound to the Past.  I'd really like to finish it before the end of this month, which will be a bit hard because hubby and I are going to Sin City for our 5 year wedding anniversary (WOOT VEGAS!), but I'm going to try!

I'm just behind behind behind... *sigh*  On everything.  Working on getting back on top of things.  I sent another chapter for Bound to the beta readers last night and my goal is to get another one to them by tomorrow.  If I can do every other day, that would be FANTASTIC.  Or even every day.  We'll have to see how it goes.

In the meantime, I'm going to keep trying to write some stuff for Lit when I have brain blocks.  It does help me to get out of my head sometimes.  Cleansing of the mental palate if you will.

I've got a cover reveal coming for Bound soon =)  Unfortunately RaineyCloud9 is no longer able to do my covers, which makes me INCREDIBLY sad and I will miss her.  This will be my first cover without her.  So far I haven't decided on a permanent replacement, but I am mostly happy with the new cover... probably gonna try someone else for the next cover though.  Fussy me.  It's just hard to replace perfection!

Anyway.  I hope everyone's doing well!  I'm trying to get back to my old self, which includes updating the blog and other social media more often with what's going on.  So next week - cover reveal!

Bound to the Past Teaser

I asked on Facebook whether people wanted the first Bound to the Past teaser to be from the past or from the present, and 99% said past.  I wasn't that surprised LOL.  

I had hoped to have the book out by now, but I've fallen very behind on pretty much everything in life ever since my grandfather passed away.  Some of it's trouble with motivation, some of it is that I fell behind and then with every new thing that I need to do, I end up falling even further behind.  Kind of sucks.  The good news is that I found my old therapist still practicing and am setting up an appointment for next week.  Lately I feel like I'm kind of in a fog most of the time and I need to get out of it and get back into really being me and getting the things done that I want to get done.  The other good news is that I'm somewhere between 1/3 and 1/2 of the way finished with Bound to the Past and I'm pretty sure I'll have it out by the end of September - although I will not be putting it up for pre-order, because I'm too far behind.  Going back to the old way of doing things until I can catch up!

I did manage to finish a story for Literotica yesterday, so keep an eye out for a new story by me in the next few days on there.  To demonstrate how foggy I am - I can't remember what I ended up calling it, but I do think it's one of the better stories I've put up on the site recently.  

Anyway.  What you really want - teaser.  Unedited.

Enjoy.

Prologue

"Yes, yes, yes, please, more!"

She arched her back, thrusting out her shoulders and her bottom as the whip fell.  Each time it landed, pain slashed through her, followed quickly by a pleasurable high that sent her soaring.  Her pussy throbbed around the vibrator inside of it, set on low, tormenting her with its minimal stimulation.  That torment only added to the arousal pulsing through her.

The whip slashed upwards, across her buttocks, and she shuddered with the sheer, sinful pleasure of it.  She felt like she was lost in an erotic haze, a head space that she only reached during a thorough whipping.  The pain was addictive, explosive, mingling with rising ecstasy.  She relished it even as it burned and stung her nerve endings.  

"More... please... harder..."

Pain sliced, agony flared across her shoulders.  Yes.

"Please..."

"Jesus Christ, Kathy!"  

Hands fumbled around her, a panicked voice, her limbs suddenly coming from from the wooden St. Andrew's Cross she was bound to.  

"No!"  She clung to the wood, not willing to relinquish the moment, not wanting to return yet - her craving hadn't been satisfied, her need not fulfilled.  They couldn't stop now!

"I'm sorry, Kathy, I'm so sorry...  Jesus Christ, you're bleeding."

Andy's panic finally registered in her brain, followed by his words.  Bleeding?  She was bleeding?  There was liquid running down her back.  Her blood?  The fog in her mind turned to glass and shattered, sending her crashing back to reality.  The endorphins that had protected her suddenly weren't enough.  The pain was agonizing - a single cut across her shoulders that did more than burn. 

She whimpered, clinging to her boyfriend's strong arms as he helped her down from the cross, her legs unable to support her.  The couch suddenly loomed in front of her and he helped her down on it, on her stomach.

Bleeding?

"Fuck, fuck, fuck..."  Andy's sheer dismay and horror made her want to shrivel in on herself.  "I shouldn't have... not this hard.  This was too hard, Kathy, we shouldn't have... fuck..."

Humiliation seared her, making her shrink in further as she felt his gentle hands pressing something soft against her back, in an effort to stop the bleeding.  She asked for it.  Wanted it.  But... Andy thought it was wrong.  The bleeding bothered her a little, but she'd wanted that pain... needed it.  She'd needed more.  She felt so empty inside now, aching from the lack of satisfaction and from his disapproval.  

"I'm sorry... I'm going to - just stay here."

His panic didn't detract from the dominance in his voice, the expectation that she would follow his command.  And she did, feeling lost and confused, grateful for the order that allowed her to remain in place, trying to understand what was wrong with her that she could be bleeding and still not feel complete.

Andy came back, it seemed only moments later to her fuzzy brain.  Something cold pressed against the burning slash on her back, making her squeal. 

"Sorry, sunshine, I'm so sorry... Fuck, I can't believe I did this."

The pain in his voice made her heart hurt.  She reached out, blinking as she tried to focus on him.  Coffee colored skin, black hair, eyes so dark brown they looked black.  Filled with worry and guilt.

"Shhh, it's okay, I told you to, I wanted you to."  She patted his leg, trying to comfort him.

"You can't have wanted this... fuck, this is just wrong.  It's sick.  I made you bleed."

Wrong.  She was wrong.  Sick.  Because she had wanted it.  Wouldn't have called a stop to it.  The pain had been so delicious, made her feel so euphoric.  She wouldn't have stopped  him even if she'd realized she was bleeding.  She'd wanted more.  Heaven help her she still did.  

There was something wrong with her.  

She whimpered.

"Sorry, sunshine, I'm sorry, fuck... I think we need to take you to the hospital."

"No!  No hospital!"  They would have to explain how she'd been hurt.  They would call her in case of emergency number.  They'd tell her parents what she and Andrew were doing.  No, no, no, no...

"You're not thinking straight, Kathy, you were in subspace and now you're dropping-"

"No, promise me, no hospital!  I won't go, I won't!" She started to thrash, and he pressed his hand down on her lower back. 

"Okay, okay... stop moving, no hospital... fuck."

What Rude Waitstaff?

Ok seriously... HUGE pet peeve of mine when I'm reading a book - the rude waitress who completely ignores the heroine, heavily flirts with the hero who (somehow) is completely oblivious, and is occasionally outright nasty to the heroine.

No.  JUST NO.

First of all, I've never seen this happen.  Ever.  I spent years working in the restaurant industry.  I have friends who still work in the restaurant industry.  I have never seen / heard of this happening.  I've never talked to anyone to whom this has happened or even seen anything on Facebook about this happening... so why the heck does it happen in like, every other romance novel?  As if this is somehow common?

A server might flirt, if they think that the person they're flirting with is single, but no one is going to jeopardize their tip money just because someone is hot.  Tip money is INCOME.  Servers don't make that much.  Income is important.  Insulting a chick who is out with a hot guy is not as important as rent, food, utilities, etc.  Not even to the younger servers who are still living with their parents or going to school.  They are working for a reason, and it's not just for fun.  Jeopardizing that, especially by being awful enough that a manager should really be called over, is NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

Also, as an aside, if you're ever out with someone, and the server DOES completely ignore you and act like a total jerk, and your date "doesn't notice," ditch the date.  Because they should notice if you're being completely ignored or if the server is being rude to you.

But it won't happen.  Because it doesn't happen.

Do you have any idea how many hot men I served every day in the restaurant?  Plenty of whom were single and wanted my number?

Besides which, TIP MONEY.  No one's going to jeopardize their income to flirt with a dude, who will probably then leave a shitty tip because you've been rude to his girlfriend.  Or sister.  Or friend.  Or whatever.

It's one of the stupidest romance tropes and it drives me nuts.

On to my own writing... Bound to the Past is going slowly but surely.  Real life has settled a bit and so I have more time to write.  Yay!  =)  I'm really enjoying Kate and Andrew and getting into both their past and their present.  They're fascinating to me, especially because they really did both get over each other and yet they're still connected and have all this past history, and new feelings for each other.  So much is the same and yet different.

It's fun =)

So that's what's going on with me now... ranting and writing WOOT!

UGH Stupid Block

I haven't written a blog in a while, but I have writer's block right now so I figured I'd try to break through it on here... ramble a little, see if anything sparks.

Currently working on Bound to the Past, the next book in the Stronghold series, aka Andrew and Kate's story, aka my first ever exes getting back together story.

It's hard.

Not because the characters are hard.  Nope.  They're great.  Love them.  Know exactly what I want to do with them.  Fleshing it out... hard.

The prologue flowed soooooo easily.  I've been waiting so long to write that scene!  Well, series of scenes.  It's a bit difficult because I've dropped so many hints about what went down between them, but my vision of what happened between them has changed drastically since I first started writing the series.

I knew what I didn't want.

I didn't want this to be a "one person is to blame for everything" kind of breakup.  I didn't want there to be any stupid miscommunications or misunderstandings or people not talking to each other because they're too prideful (aka don't actually care enough).  I didn't want this to be a case where someone is clearly in the wrong - even if it appears that way initially.

I didn't want a book where both of them have been in love with each other for years and can't find anyone else.  Nope.  Just a heads up, if you're hoping for a "I've never loved anyone like you and never will again" type of book, this isn't it.  Both of them have moved on and gotten over each other, although Andrew's never quite gotten over his issues surrounding their breakup.  Kate's done a better job with that, but she's still got some baggage too.  This isn't going to be a reconnecting, "we're going to fix things now because we could have never loved anyone but each other."  Mostly because I don't believe in that.  I've been in love with two men in my life, passionately and desperately, fortunately at different times.  One of those relationships worked out, but the first one didn't.  And for a long time, I believed the whole "I'll never love anyone like I loved him" and "you never get over your first love" thing.  I mean, no I won't love anyone like I loved him and thank goodness for that, because it wasn't super healthy and I wouldn't want my relationships to be the same.  Since he was my first love and I am definitely over him (you couldn't pay me to get back together with him, but I do enjoy running into him at mutual friends' gatherings and knowing that he's doing well and is happy), I know that it's possible.

I didn't want a book about love lasting over time when there's no connection between the two characters.  Sure, nostalgia lasts, caring lasts, but real love?  With no communication and no longer knowing the person?  Yeah, that's not realistic.  Not when the timeline is years.

I wanted a book about falling in love a second time with the same person.  The same person, but a person who has changed.  Who has grown.  It's not the same relationship.  I wanted roadblocks where there were none before, I wanted struggling to understand the changes their partner has gone through.  New issues, new relationship, same people.

The prologue and the first couple of chapters were so easy.  The just floooowed.  Now I'm to Andrew and Kate trying to scene at Stronghold again and I'm hitting a few roadblocks myself.  Not sure why.  Haven't even gotten them to the private room yet.  But it's like, I write a few paragraphs and then I just... *brain fizzle*

So I'll step away and work on something else for a bit.  Mostly another title for Dark Angel.  But even there, I write maybe 2 or 3 times as much as I do for Andrew and Kate and then... *brain fizzle*

So I'll take a break, start reading something, and then my brain starts working over time and I start figuring out all these things that I'm going to write for Andrew and Kate if I can just get past this ONE DAMN SCENE.

*sigh*

Stupid brain.

Okay, my fingers are feeling a little more interested in working now that I've vented a bit and gotten kind of in the mood for writing.  Let's see if I can't get more than just a couple paragraphs done!

New Release - Gabrielle's Discipline!

It's up!  It's here!  Enjoy!

Amazon Barnes & Noble Smashwords

To escape the scandal of trying to elope with an unworthy man, Gabrielle finds herself married to the man she loves - a charming rake and her guardian's best friend, Mr. Felix Hood. He's the third son of a Viscount, he's darkly handsome, and he's in love with her stepmother. Or so she thinks. 

Felix Hood had been fighting the urge to be leg shackled ever since he met Gabrielle Astley, but once her honor was at stake, he knew he'd rather die then allow her to marry someone else. He's not a perfect man, and he has no experience with being in a relationship, but he's determined to make his marriage work, even if he has to spank his fiery bride daily to do so. 

They retreat to the countryside immediately following their wedding, where Felix hopes to strengthen their relationship before they return to London for the end of the Season. To his delight, Gabrielle turns out to be everything he'd hoped in private - he's submissive, passionate, and responds beautifully to even his darkest desires. But what will happen when they return to London Society? 

Gabrielle is determined to replace her stepmother in Felix's affections. She's been through a multitude of changes in her life, none of which have ended particularly happily for her, but she has to make one last try - because, after all, she's married to him for better or worse, till death do them part. To her surprise, once they're alone, he seems to return her regard and she blossoms under his discipline and care... but will he still feel the same when he's faced with Cordelia, Gabrielle's stepmother again? 

Step into a world of alpha males, spankings, very steamy situations, and domestic discipline. Gabrielle's Discipline is approximately 90k words and is a standalone within a series, complete with a HEA for the couple. 

Gabrielle and Felix's story began in Philip's Rules and was further explored in Undisciplined, however it is not necessary to read either book to enjoy this one (although it is encouraged for a deeper understanding of the characters).

Pre-Order Now! - Gabrielle's Discipline

Yay!  Gabrielle's Discipline is now available for Pre-order on Amazon =)  It will release on June 25 everywhere.  After release, the price will go up to $3.99.  On Smashwords and Barnes & Noble it will be $2.99 for the first week and then go up after that (since I can't do pre-orders there).  Basically I'm trying to keep the price the same for my loyal fans who follow my social media and so are the first to know when a new book comes out, even though I'm increasing the prices of my books this year.  So pre-order and get a deal!

I'm super excited to finally be able to share this book with you... Gabrielle has been one of the hardest characters to write.  First because she was so mean.  Then because I discovered she was so sad.  And then because she's very moody lol.  I had a lot of fun with her in the end though, and I especially enjoyed Felix becoming exasperated along with me at all her mood swings and antics.  Although, sometimes I felt like kicking him too.  He's possibly one of the most clueless alpha males I've ever had the pleasure of writing, and I do feel like that's a good thing.  He's very real to me, in large part because he struggles with the relationship and Gabrielle.  My alpha males aren't perfect and I love them for that, because they're willing to admit it and keep trying to become better.

I'm knee deep in editing right now to get the final draft submitted by the deadline, and really looking forward to this one coming out!